Reckless Devotion: Book 2 Page 10

  I glance behind me when I hear Gabriel enter the room, carrying two big glasses of red wine. He hands me one then kisses my forehead. “Be right back.”

  “Okay.”

  As I sip my wine, I look around the gorgeous apartment. It matches Gabriel on every level, sophisticated, masculine, sexy. I’ll stay all weekend if I can. He comes back a few minutes later, carrying two bowls. Handing me one, he smiles.

  “Boeuf bourguignon.”

  I look down at the dish, inhaling the rich aroma. “Did you make this?”

  “Yes.” He laughs. “No. I ordered it from a restaurant in Old Town and picked it up. I can make it, but it takes all day.”

  “So you’ll make it for me sometime?”

  “I will. I actually enjoy cooking.” He sits next to me. “There was a woman in France that I worked with, and she offered to teach me a few things.”

  “I bet she did.” I smile as I take a bite.

  “It’s not like that, Mia. She was like a mother to me. Her husband died years ago, and she had no children so she just became the office caregiver, always tending to the needs of the single people. She and I for whatever reason became really close. Closer than I am with my own mother. She taught me to cook, and I would sit at her kitchen table while she told me stories about growing up in France. I always imagined that in her heyday she was beautiful, but grief and loneliness destroyed her features.”

  “What did she do in your office?”

  “She was part of the administrative staff. I’m told they tried to promote her numerous times over the years, but she never wanted it. She liked her simple life.” He smiles at the memory. “I miss her.”

  “What’s her name?”

  “Antoinette.”

  “She sounds great.”

  “She is.”

  “So, you’re not close to your mom?”

  “No. We get along fine, but she’s always been preoccupied with her many husbands, but out of that came Sara so I’ll never complain about the choices she made.” He takes a bite of his meal and chews for a moment. “Did she ever tell you about what happened when she was born?”

  “No.”

  He nods. “She almost died. Our mom went into premature labor, and they said if they didn’t deliver, the baby wouldn’t make it. She was just four pounds when she was born. I had to go stay with my aunt because my mom and stepdad had to spend so much time at the hospital. I still remember the first time I saw her even though I was just four. She was so little and pink.” I laugh softly as he continues. “And instead of being this fragile delicate little thing like everyone thought, she was bold and vibrant and full of personality. She made our lives so joyful. I loved her the minute I laid eyes on her.”

  “That’s sweet. Was her father a good man?”

  “I don’t know. I don’t remember a lot about him. He worked a lot so he was never home. They didn’t seem to fight, but one day, all his stuff was gone, and Mom sat us down and said we were gonna live by ourselves for a while. He never came back, and I thought Sara never noticed, but years later, when we were standing at our mother’s fourth wedding, I looked at her and tears were streaming down her face. I asked her what was wrong, and she said she was scared that she’d be like our mom. She worried that she would spend her entire life searching for the right man, but never finding him.”

  “That’s so sad.”

  “Yeah, it tore me up. She’s such a beautiful soul, and I’ve believed all this time that she’d find a guy worthy of her. That’s why I’m so protective of her with Jamie.”

  “I think they have a lot of potential.”

  “Do you still think we do?”

  “Am I here?”

  “There you go answering me with a question.”

  I laugh. “I do that, don’t I?”

  “You do that.” He sets his near empty bowl on the coffee table, then takes mine and puts it down. “It means everything to me that you’re here right now.”

  “I know.”

  As Gabriel leans closer, my breath hitches. I’ve been waiting all day for this moment. His hand slides to the back of my neck as our mouths unite, a gentle gesture, but with Gabriel’s trademark firmness behind it.

  “What do you want from me tonight?” he whispers against my lips. “Tell me and it’s yours.”

  “Overpower me, Gabriel.” He pulls back gazing into my eyes. “Dominate me. Make me crawl, beg, cry, scream. Take me somewhere I’ve never been before.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “I am so sure. Don’t hold back, okay?” I cup his cheek. “This is consent, Gabriel. Twist me inside out. I want to be your…” I shake my head. “I don’t know why I get emotional when I think about this, but maybe it’s because I know the meaning it has for me now that I understand.”

  “Think about what?”

  “About being your devoted. How do you say it in French?”

  “Dévoué. Mon dévoué.”

  I close my eyes for a moment, recalling a few of the words I knew so many years ago. “Je suis à vous, Gabriel. Je suis votre dévoué.” I smile. “I hope I said that right, but if I didn’t—”

  “You did, Mia, if you meant that you are mine, you are my devoted, then you said it right.”

  “Good. So now in English, could you tear me apart please? There’s nothing I want more.”

  Gabriel smiles, searching my eyes for a moment as the smile fades and is replaced by a domineering mask. The glint he gets in his eyes leaves me breathless.

  “Stand up,” he commands. Clamoring to my feet, I wait for his next direction. “Kneel.”

  Fighting a smile, I drop to my knees, placing my hands on his thighs, as he unbuckles his belt. When the zipper of his slacks comes down, I gasp with excitement.

  “Worship your cock, Mia.” He pulls it out, holding it out to me by its base. God, how I’ve missed this beast of a man.

  I glance up at him. “What are the rules of worship?”

  “There are no rules right now. Do as you wish.”

  As my mouth closes down over his incredible manhood, I suck, swirling my tongue over the tip, then up and down the shaft, pausing only to juggle his balls in my mouth. He sighs, dragging his fingers through my hair, then shoving my head down further, a move I normally hate, but allow. It’s becoming obvious to me that my normal rules don’t apply to Gabriel.

  I pull up, gasping for air, before going back to my tasks. “I love your cock,” I whisper in between sucks. “It’s so big. I dream about it.”

  Gabriel watches me with hooded eyes, but remains silent.

  “I just want to be everything for you,” I continue. “I want to be anything you need.” He grips my neck, and a grin spreads across my lips. “What else can I do for you, sir? How can I please you tonight?”

  He shakes his head. “Just keep sucking.”

  “Do you want me to be your little girl? Do you need that, sir?” I drag my tongue up his shaft, not knowing where these words and thoughts are coming from. “Because I’ll let you call me that right now, if that’s what you want.”

  His eyes open wide. “Mia…”

  “I can take it. I’m already on my knees for you. Call me what you want.” I notice his heavy breathing. “With sex, we can be whatever we want to be. It’s okay with me.”

  Abruptly, he pulls away from me sinking into the couch and covering his face with his hands. “I need a minute, Mia.”

  “Why?” I tug at his arms, but he resists. “Gabriel?”

  “Please, Mia.” He stands and walks away to lean on the kitchen island. I don’t know why he’s upset.

  “Did I say something wrong?”

  “No.”

  “But you’re upset.”

  “Mia!” His tone causes me to pause in shock that he raised his voice. “Please.”

  I walk up behind him wondering what’s wrong, but then, after remembering what he said this morning, I think I get it. He’s scared. Figuring out my next move, I sink to my knees, and crawl across
the floor. When I reach him, I drag my hands down the tailored slacks still covering his legs. He peers down at me with fear radiating in his eyes.

  “I can’t do this, Mia.”

  “You can. I told you that you can.”

  “I don’t want to want it.” He runs his fingers through his hair. “But I can’t stop wanting to.”

  “Gabriel. Look at me.”

  “I need a minute.”

  “Gabriel?” He finally meets my eyes. “Do to me everything you want. Let’s get it all out. We’ll handle it together.” I take a deep breath as his brow furrows. “I’m not scared of you. Gabriel, I trust you.”

  “You trust me?”

  “Completely. I’m your devoted, right? Remember what you told me before? My body is yours to use as you wish. You’re my ruler, Gabriel, and rulers can do whatever they want.”

  He shakes his head. “You don’t know what you’re asking for.”

  “I don’t care. I came here willingly knowing everything that could happen. I sat with you this morning and listened to what you needed to tell me, and I still came. I still wanted to. You might be scared, but I’m not. I’m burning with desire for you to unleash what you’ve been holding in.” I stand up and press myself against him. “I want your domination, Gabriel. So give it to me.”

  After searching my eyes for a moment, he scoops me up by the waist, throws me over his shoulder and carries me down the hall to his room where he tosses me down on his bed. Yessss!

  Without a word, he climbs up and grips my collarbone. “Finish.”

  I suck his still hard dick into my mouth as he fucks my mouth furiously. I didn’t know I could do this, deep throat a monster cock without gagging, but I’m keeping up with him, like a motherfucking boss. Suddenly, he pulls out, breathing hard, but just looking at me.

  “Tie me to the bed,” I whisper, barely able to catch my breath. “Please, Gabriel.”

  He looks down at me with his hooded eyes, still gripping my hair in his fist as he hovers above me. I can tell he’s deciding what to do next.

  “Please.” I prop myself up on my elbows. “I’m begging you, Gabriel. I want to be helpless. I want you to make me…”

  Gabriel cups my cheek. “Make you what?”

  “Yours. I want to be yours. I want to be torn into a thousand little pieces. I want to be dick-whipped goo at your feet.”

  A smile tugs at his lips. “You remember your safe word?”

  “Prada.”

  He nods. “Take your clothes off.”

  “Yes, sir.”

  He climbs out of bed, and goes into his closet, returning a moment later. I extend my wrists, but he just chuckles shaking his head no, then straps one of the cuffs on to my ankle. After strapping my other one, he grabs both in one hand then pulls them up until their above my head, attaching the cuffs to the headboard. I am exposed in a way I never have been before. Rising up on his knees, Gabriel hovers over me.

  “Brace yourself, ma petite.”

  I take a deep breath then gasp as he slams his cock into me. My knees are nearly by my ears as Gabriel pounds into me with so much force I feel my insides rattle. He holds my ankle with one hand, but grips my breast with the other so hard I’m sure I’ll be bruised tomorrow.

  “You’re gonna… leave… marks…” I utter as he fucks me.

  “And?”

  “I… want… them… sir.”

  He pulls out suddenly, causing me to groan, but then replaces his cock with his mouth and buries his tongue deep inside me.

  “Fuck, Mia.” He murmurs as he moves to my clit sucking so hard it makes me lightheaded.

  “Paddle…” I moan. “Please.”

  “What?” He looks up at me. “What do you want?”

  “Paddle.”

  He’s gone for a moment, but returns quickly, holding up the black leather device. “You want this?”

  “Yes.”

  “Where?”

  “Everywhere.”

  Before I can even process his next move, I feel the sting across my ass, once, twice, three times. I suck in my breath, and with no time to recover, it comes down again between my legs, hitting my clit, and sending me into yet another orgasm. He smacks me with it several more times, on my thighs, my ass, my pussy, the bottom of my feet. I’m in pleasure overload when I feel his firm grasp on one of my breasts. He smacks just my nipple, then adds nipple clamps, tugging on them and causing me to squirm from the sensation. It seems to shoot straight through my core. Gabriel returns to his pussy buffet and drags his tongue over everything he can reach, which is a lot in my current condition.

  “I want you to come again.” He shoves his cock in me once more, then adds two fingers, filling me beyond what I thought I could handle. “I’m gonna fuck your ass, Mia. Do you hear me? I’m going in. I’m taking it.”

  “It’s yours.”

  He’s suddenly above me gripping my chin. “It’s mine?”

  “All of me is yours.”

  He gazes into my eyes for a moment before unhooking my ankles. “Stand on the floor.”

  I climb out of bed, trying to stand on legs that will barely hold me up. Gabriel stands before me, silent, but I can see in his eyes the torment he feels over what to do next. Clawing at his chest, I press against him.

  “Take all of me, Gabriel. I just want to be what you need.”

  After searching my eyes for a moment, he speaks. “Bend over and extend your arms.”

  I do so, laying my face forward on the bed. I feel Gabriel pressed against me, sliding his dick in me once again. I’m so sore, I flinch as he enters me, but remain silent. The next sensation I feel is his hand on my throat, so I grip the sheets as he hits me full force. Tears begin to slide down my face and I don’t know if it’s from actual pain or the intensity of what’s happening right now, but either way, I love it.

  After what seems like a thousand years, Gabriel’s body tenses so I turn around, fall to my knees and suck him into my mouth, swallowing every drop he gives me. He sucks in his breath, tangling his fingers in my hair, then falls to the floor with me. Cupping my face, he kisses me repeatedly and then holds me so close I can barely catch my breath. When his body starts to shake, I try to pull away, but I can’t break free from his grasp as he whispers something I can’t hear.

  “What? Baby? What is it?” He holds me like this for several minutes, clearly overcome by some kind of emotion, but he won’t let me see his face. “Please talk to me, Gabriel.”

  “Mia…” His voice is soft as he pulls away enough that I can see his face. Shockingly, tears stream down his cheeks. “I wasn’t gonna say it yet… I was… fuck. I’ve never…” He can hardly get words out as he squeezes my hands, studying my face. Breathing hard, he searches my eyes. “I love you.”

  I pull my head back in shock. “What?”

  “I’m in love with you.”

  Blinking rapidly, I try to process what he just said to me.

  “I know we haven’t known each other long, but I knew the day I met you that we were gonna make magic. I never could have imagined it would be like this, that you would be the only woman I’ve ever fallen for, but you are. You are, Mia.”

  My mouth falls open in complete disbelief.

  “I can be the man you need, Mia. I can. I’ve learned that tonight. We can balance this. I can be good for you. Just please give me a chance.” I’m still trying to get my brain to react as he continues. “Mia? Did you hear me?”

  When I finally snap out of the shock I’m in, I put my fingers over his lips to silence him.

  “Do you mean it? Maybe it’s just the intensity of the moment. It’s just the high.”

  He lowers my hand from his lips. “No, Mia, it’s not. I even admitted it when I was in a session with Dr. Nashito. I’m sure of it. I’ll prove it to you, just let me.”

  I wipe his cheeks with my hands as my own eyes fill with tears. “Are you positive? Because I don’t want to believe it if you’re not positive.”

  “I’
ve never been so clear on anything. How many times in my life do you think I’ve shed a tear over anything?”

  I shake my head softly. “Why are you now? You’re upset that you’re having feelings like this?”

  “Upset?” He grabs my shoulders. “That’s the last emotion I feel right now. I get it if you’re not there yet, Mia, I do. I haven’t been great to you, but I’ve never felt so sure that I’m with the person I was meant to be with. The tears came because…” He pauses, lifting my hands to his lips and kissing them. “Because I didn’t think it was possible, and not with someone like you. Everything I thought I knew about myself has been altered since you walked in my life, and I didn’t know that I could be the man I’ve been this last week. I didn’t think I had it in me.” Leaning forward, he kisses my mouth softly. “I didn’t know there was a middle ground and that you would meet me there. I thought it had to be all my way or nothing, but I was so wrong, and I’ve never been happier to admit that. Mia, I didn’t think I would or even could fall in love. I’ve been so detached from women, from emotions, from myself.” He offers a slight smile, as tears trickle down my cheeks. “Then you came in, and just like the storm of the century, you whipped through and tore down everything that needed to go. You stripped me down to the man I truly am inside, and you nurtured him. You went from a storm to a light rainfall, offering just enough sustenance to help me grow. You didn’t let me give up on myself or on what we could have. You recognize that there’s a side of me that is always going to need to control you in bed, and you let me fulfill that need, but in a way that feels good for both of us. I don’t even know if you can comprehend the magnitude of what you’ve done for me, but I know that I love you, that you’re the only woman I’ve ever loved, and you’ll be the only woman I will ever love. I want to spend my life with you. Every minute. Do you understand now, mon amour? Do you understand?”

  My breath is so shaky, I can’t get my words out as I gaze at the beautiful man before me. His eyes are intensified by the tears which shine bright blue behind damp eyelashes. Taking a deep breath, I nod. “I do understand, Gabriel. I understand how major it is that you’ve put your guard so far down and let yourself be vulnerable in front of me.” I exhale slowly. “So the least I can do is the same. After we had lunch on Tuesday, do you remember how I wanted to get away from you?”