Reckless Devotion (Book One) Read online

  Nodding, I pick up my clutch and get out of the car. As I walk, I can feel how wet I am. From a kiss. And words. This is definitely different. After unlocking my door, I turn around to wave. Gabriel nods, then drives off, leaving me wondering what the hell just happened.

  DRIVING DOWN THE street toward home, my mind is clouded with desire for the woman I just left, but I had no choice. I couldn’t go in there yet. She drives me insane on one hand, fighting me with every breath, but then I gaze into her eyes, and they seem to beg me to tear her walls down. I sense that she’s needed someone like me for a long time, but I didn’t bargain on her being what I needed too. She’s not submissive, not one ounce of her is, and I’m not used to that. I don’t know how to handle a woman that will fight back. I want her to bend at my will, lie at my feet, beg me to break her, but she won’t. So why am I so excited?

  Stopping at a light, I run my fingers through my hair and lean my elbow against the window. That kiss though… fuck. That was a new experience. So passionate, it almost took my breath away. If that’s a prelude to how intense our relationship will be, then I’m glad I took a step back. We need to pace ourselves or this flame will explode and burn out in a month, and there’s no way I want to be done with her in a month.

  Continuing my drive, I think about my next step. I have to get her alone, and then I have to show myself to her. It’s only fair she knows what she’s getting into with me. I’ve known for a long time I’m not ordinary in my desires and needs. It takes someone unique, brave even, to walk into this life I lead. The most important piece though, is Sara. She cannot know about this side of me. I have to trust that no matter what, no matter what I do, Mia will keep my secrets. Tonight’s little test was a good sign. She could’ve told Sara I was a prick. She could’ve refused to talk to me again, but she didn’t. She carried on as if I hadn’t just pissed her off.

  A grin spreads across my lips at the memory as I pull into my complex. My comparison of a wild mare is fitting. She’s free, untamed, and reluctant to take direction from anyone, especially a man.

  I park and walk inside, jingling my keys in my hand. I should walk away now before we get too deep. I seek the opposite of me in women—submissive, yielding, passive. I’ve never once in my life wanted a replica of me, but fuck it. I couldn’t walk away now if I tried. She’s captivated me, and now I have to see it through. I’ll end up leaving her ravaged and stripped of everything she knows. Hell, if I’m not careful, she could do the same to me.

  Once in my apartment, I strip down, and sit on the edge of my bed, staring at my throbbing cock and the phone in my hand. I could fuck with her some more, ensure that she’ll think of nothing but me until we’re together again. Or I could leave her hanging, wondering what I’ll do next. As if it could talk, my dick seems to point straight to the phone. Smiling, I dial her number and wait a few rings until she answers.

  “Yes, Gabriel?”

  God, that rasp in her voice is the sexiest thing I’ve ever heard. She has a deep voice for a woman, rich and sexy. I want to hear it as often as possible.

  “What are you doing?”

  “What’s it to you? You didn’t want to come in.”

  “Are you mad?”

  “No.”

  “Are you naked?”

  She pauses and I hear the snicker. “No. Are you?”

  “Yep.”

  “And?”

  “What do you think about that? Do you wonder what I look like naked? Do you want to see me?”

  “Good night, Gabriel.”

  “Can’t handle it?”

  “You’re just talking shit, and I don’t have time for that.”

  I have to think of something quick. I have to keep her on the phone. “I do.”

  “Do what?”

  “Wonder what you look like naked. Want to see you. In fact, my eyes are closed right now trying to imagine the beauty you hide under clothes. I bet your skin is as soft as silk.”

  “Maybe.”

  “I bet your body is amazing like the rest of you.”

  “What are you up to?” Her voice softens.

  “Right now, I just want you to know that I’m gonna fall asleep thinking of that kiss we shared. Images of you will play in my mind all night. That is, right after I finish getting off.”

  She’s silent for a moment, leaving me wondering what her reaction is. “Mia?”

  “Are you touching yourself right now?”

  I smile, realizing I’ve got her. “I could be. Is that what you want me to do?”

  “I don’t care. I’m just asking a question.”

  “Stop lying to me, Mia. Tell me the truth. Do you want me to stroke my cock while I talk to you?”

  She’s silent again, then softly utters one word. “Yes.”

  “Well, you’re in luck. That’s exactly what I’m doing. Now you know what you need to do.” I let my words hang between us for a moment. “Don’t you, Mia?”

  “Take off my dress?”

  “That’s right. I’ll wait.” I hear rustling and smile, realizing she’s obeying me.

  “I’m naked,” she says.

  “Good. How do you like to get yourself off, Mia? Tell me.”

  “I have a vibrator.”

  “Is it little or big?”

  “Big.”

  “Do you slide it inside of you pretending it’s a cock?”

  Silence again and then, “Yes.”

  “Tonight, you’ll pretend it’s my cock, yes?”

  “Maybe.”

  Ah, she still has some fight. “Mia,” I say with a stern tone. “Play nice with me. I’ll reward you.”

  “Reward me? I’m not a dog.”

  “No, you most certainly are not a dog. You are the most exquisite woman I’ve ever seen. So full of fire and spite. Wouldn’t you like to please me and see what things I might do for you in return?”

  “Kind of,” she admits. Her voice is soft and almost sweet, allowing me the opening I needed.

  “Give in.” I close my eyes, sliding my hand up and down my shaft. “Spread your legs for me and get your toy. Make a lot of noise too. I need to hear you.”

  “I don’t make noise.”

  “Well you will tonight because you want me to be happy. You want me to come just from the sound of your luscious voice. You want me to know what you’re doing and how good it feels.”

  More silence, then I hear the soft hum of her vibrator. Leaning back in bed, I imagine what she must be doing now, her legs opens, her tits out, massaging her pussy with her toy and thinking of me. Fuuuck.

  She moans and it brings a smile to my lips. “Is it inside of you, Mia?”

  “Yes,” she says softly.

  “Does it make you think of me?”

  “I hope you’re bigger.”

  Grinning, I respond. “I am. I’m as big as you want me to be right now. I’m so hard, Mia, so thick, because of how much you turn me on. If I was there, I’d be between your legs right now instead of that toy.” Her heavy breathing comes across the phone line, so I decide to push her a little further. “Tell me what you see with your eyes closed.”

  “I can’t.”

  “You can, Mia. You can do anything. Tell me.”

  “You,” she whispers after a moment of silence. “I’m imagining what your cock is like.”

  “Does it look good?”

  “Mm hmm, like the rest of you.”

  “Do you like how I look?”

  “Yes.”

  “Do you like how I kiss?”

  A long sigh. “Yes.”

  “Do you wish my tongue was kissing you between your legs?” She moans in response. “Licking and sucking on your clit until you scream my name? God, I cannot wait.”

  “Fuck,” she murmurs.

  “What, baby? Tell me, mon petit trésor.”

  “Say something else in French.”

  “I will if you ask nicely.”

  “Please, Gabriel?”

  “Okay, but promise me one thing f
irst.”

  “What?”

  “You cannot come until I give you permission.”

  “Oh come on,” she moans.

  “You can do it. When you’re ready, you ask me nicely. Got it?”

  “Or?”

  “You’ll find out.”

  “Fine.”

  “Mia, Je ne peux pas attendre pour glisser ma bite à l'intérieur de vous. Je veux te baiser pendant des jours. Je rêve de vous, me demandant comment vous goûtez.”

  “Fuck,” she whispers. “Jesus, Gabriel. Tell me what you said in English. Please.”

  “I said, I cannot wait to slide my dick inside you. I want to fuck you for days. I dream of you, wondering how you taste.” She moans softly. “Now, lick your fingers, Mia. Taste yourself for me.”

  “Yes,” she pants. “Okay.”

  “Ah, fuck, my dick is so tight. I’m gonna explode all over my hand because of you.”

  “May I come, Gabriel? Please?”

  “Did you lick your fingers?”

  “Yes,” she moans again. “Please, I’m so close.”

  “Lick them loud enough for me to hear. Suck them like messy pasta.”

  I listen intently as she does exactly what I asked. I just learned something important. If she’s turned on enough, she’s compliant.

  “Is that good?”

  “Very good, Mia. Do you wish I was there fucking you right now?”

  “Oooh, please,” she whimpers, the sound pushing me even closer to the edge.

  “Do you?”

  “Yes, dammit, yes! Please, I need permission!”

  “Yes, Mia. You may come.”

  She exhales, moaning and whispering my name, and that’s all I needed to finish me off. My dick pulses in my hand, spilling white cream across my stomach and chest, as I listen to her soft moans of ecstasy.

  We’re both silent. I don’t know what she’s thinking, but I know what I am. She’s amazing. She’s willing to follow me, and she sounds fucking incredible whispering my name.

  “I have to go now,” she says, the vulnerable begging woman from a few minutes ago wiped away.

  “Are you embarrassed?”

  “No. I just need to go.”

  “All right. I’ll let you go this time, but it’ll probably be the last time, so enjoy your freedom while it lasts.”

  “Freedom? Whatever.”

  I chuckle. “Good night, Mia. You’ll hear from me soon.”

  “Yippee.” She hangs up before I can say anything else. As I stand to walk into the bathroom so I can clean up, I can’t wipe the smile off my face. That woman just might kill me, but I’ll die a happy man.

  CURLING UP IN bed, after hanging up with Gabriel, I examine how I feel about what just took place. I gave in to his little game, but why? I don’t even like phone sex, so what the fuck? I wish I could talk to Sara, but I can’t. Even if I could, it’s not like I could tell her that her brother just demanded I my suck my own pussy soaked fingers, and I did it even though he’s not here to see me. Oh, and by the way, he made me ask for permission to come. Nothing out of the ordinary there.

  My phone buzzes, and I roll my eyes expecting it to be Gabriel poking at me again, but it’s a text from Sara.

  Are you alone?

  Yes. You?

  No. Going to Jamie’s. Eeek.

  I laugh reading her response.

  Good luck. Hope he’s packing.

  Me too!

  Just as I put the phone down, it buzzes again.

  Why aren’t you with G? Did the night go okay?

  Yeah, everything’s cool. I’m sure I’ll see him again. We’re just taking it slow.

  I do not like lying to her. I have to set some ground rules.

  You’re sure?

  Listen, sweetie, don’t worry. G and I are completely on the same level. It’s all good.

  K. I just want you to be happy. Him too.

  We both want that. Have fun with J.

  Thanks.

  She ends with a bunch of smiling emoticons. On Monday, I’ll just tell her that Gabriel is off topic. It’s the only way I can keep our relationship private without lying to her.

  THE NEXT MORNING, while leaning against my kitchen counter waiting for coffee to brew, I run my fingers through my messy hair and yawn, wondering why I woke up so damn early on a Sunday. When the coffee maker is done, I grab a mug and fill it to the brim, sipping the excess as I shuffle into the living room. I love chilly Sunday mornings with coffee, the paper, and my slouchy cashmere socks. They keep me warm in my nearly naked state. I can’t stand being wrapped in heavy pj’s, even in the winter. My tank and boy shorts suit me fine, but the added socks and robe keep me cozy.

  Sitting on the sofa, I tuck my feet under me, and sip my coffee as I sift through the paper. My kitty, Vixen, is curled up in front of the gas fireplace, purring so loudly I can hear her from here. A moment later, we both glance up at the door when we hear a knock. Glancing at the wall clock, I crinkle my brow, wondering who the hell that is at this time of day. If someone tries to talk to me about Jesus, I’m gonna lose my shit.

  Peering through the peephole, I step back from the door when I see Gabriel standing there. What the fuck?

  I open the door. “What are you doing here?”

  “A little birdie told me you never eat breakfast.” He holds up a bag from the nearby bakery. “So I brought you breakfast.”

  Crossing my arms in front of me, I just stare at him with a blank expression. “You came over to my house without an invitation.”

  “I did. Are you gonna ask me in?”

  “No.”

  “After all we shared last night?”

  I try to fight back a grin, but give in. “You can come in.”

  “Thank you.” He bows his head slightly. “You like bagels?”

  “I suspect you already know the answer.” I close the door behind him as he walks in with huge grin on his face.

  “I got the everything bagel just for you. Plenty of cream cheese too.”

  I smile, shaking my head. It is kind of sweet. “Do you want some coffee?”

  “I’d love some.”

  “K.” He follows me into the kitchen, and I’m all too aware of my skimpy clothing. When I turn around, he’s leaning on the island watching me. “What?”

  “You look so fucking good like that. Like you’ve been made love to. Did you dream about me?”

  “Cream and sugar?”

  “Just black, baby. I like my coffee the way I like my women, strong as fuck.”

  “No, you don’t. You like weak women who fall at your feet and quiver at the sight of you.”

  “Yeah,” he grins. “That’s accurate.”

  “That’s not me.”

  His smile fades as he walks around the island toward me. I’m tempted to back up, but I force myself to stay still. He grips my chin, gazing down at me.

  “Wrong. You are like that. I saw it last night.”

  “I was just playing around.”

  “Maybe I was too.”

  “How will we know?”

  “Oh, you’ll know.”

  I lift the coffee mug up to put some distance between us. “Your coffee.”

  He smiles. “Thanks.”

  I quickly move away and walk back into the living room, resuming my spot on the sofa. Gabriel sits next to me, carrying the bag of bagels with him. When Vixen sees him, she tilts her head, then stands, stretches and walks over, rubbing against his leg. Gabriel looks down and scratches her head, while my mouth hangs open. That cat hates everyone. She only tolerates Sara, and she’s letting Gabriel rub all over her. That whore.

  “Cute cat.”

  “Thanks. Her name is Vixen.”

  “Hmm, just like her mama.” He opens the bag and pulls out a bagel for me, then opens the container of cream cheese, smearing it over the bagel with a plastic knife. Sipping my coffee, I watch his every move. Strong, commanding, deliberate. He’s not gentle with the bagel, and he won’t be with me eithe
r. All I need to know now is why he’s here.

  “Here you go,” he hands it to me on a napkin. “Is that enough cream cheese?”

  “Yeah, that’s good.”

  He smiles, and watches me take a bite, before preparing his own bagel. His eyes shift up, like crystal blue jewels shining behind dark lashes. “You know I can see your tits through that tank, don’t you?”

  “Yes.”

  “Why don’t you cover up?”

  “Because this is how I dress when I’m at home and not expecting company.”

  “But I’m here now.”

  “And?” I chew a bite of bagel then grin. “Does it bother you?”

  “No.”

  “Why are you here, Gabriel? To bring me breakfast? What else? To pick up where we left off last night?”

  He shakes his head. “Just breakfast. I don’t like it that you don’t eat well, even though your figure clearly hasn’t suffered.”

  “How do you know how well I eat?”

  He smiles. “I just do.”

  “You talked to Sara?” He grins and tears into his bagel, taking a bite. “That isn’t fair, Gabriel. If I can’t talk to her about you, then you can’t talk to her about me.”

  “Is that so? You’re making rules now?”

  I pull my head back. “I’m just having a conversation.”

  “Relax, Mia. I called to check on her, and she invited me to breakfast. I asked if you were invited. She said no, you hate breakfast and never eat it, so I told her I would make sure you had some today. It was really innocent.”

  “Why do you care if I eat breakfast? I think it was just a ploy to see me again.”

  “I knew you were smart. I won’t deny that I wanted to see you, hear your voice, stare into those eyes.”

  “So you came to fuck me?”

  He chuckles, ignoring my question as he chews a bite of bagel. After that, he washes it down with coffee. Through all of this, I sit quietly waiting for him to say something. Do something. After a few minutes, he sets his coffee down.

  “Put your mug down, Mia.”

  It’s definitely a command. “No.”

  “Don’t push me.”

  “I’m not afraid of you, Gabriel.”